Luke here. Drag says I am an original and wanted me to give you boys some dating tips. I don’t know what original means. I guess everyone is kind of an original in their own way. I just do what I want and try to laugh a little along the way. Here it goes boys: 

1. Squint your eyes a lot like you’re looking at the sun. 

2. Always keep the top three buttons of your shirt undone and have some dirt on it too. 

3. Go to the barber often to keep the lines on your mane tight. 

4. Have dirt on your pants. 

5. Always have dirt around. 

6. And Sweat. 

7. Box. Women like manly men. 

8. When you see her, show her your teeth and don’t have a failure to communicate. 

9. Invite her and her friends over for dinner and have them sneek some good eats past the line guard or else it’s peanut butter and jelly on Wonderbread. 

10. Split the 50 eggs with her for desert and when she can’t finish hers, eat the rest so y’all win the bet. 

11. Don’t let Dragline flirt with her. 12. Carry a bottle opener around your neck so you can open things for her. 

13. Sing to her in your bunkbed. 

14. The next day, go workout with tools and carry them on your shoulder on the way home. 

15. When she passes with her friends in an old truck, get in the back. 

16. Take your shirt off and wipe the dirt off your arms with it. 

17. Have dirt in your pockets so you can put it on yourself. 

18. Have dirt everywhere. 

19. Tell her to stop by a lake so you can catch a giant turtle for her and put it in the truck. Women like resourcefulness. 

20. When she gets to the yard, put your shirt back on and talk with her about life in the truck for awhile. 

21. Hop out and wipe the dirt off your arms. 

22. Kiss her, show her your teeth, squint again, then say something poetic about the sun. 

Always be a cool hand and have an ace up your sleeve.